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tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  February 12, 2016 12:37am-1:37am EST

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and applause ] 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with tonight -- susan sarandon,e single," actress alison brie, ost, katie nolan, featuring the 8g band with jaleel bunton. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers! and applause ] >> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyers, this is "late night." how's everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] wonderful to hear. to the news. hillary clinton and bernie sanders earlier tonight
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[ laughter ]nced yesterday that he's dropping out of the presidential race. christie said he's not sure whaten someone reminded him he's still the governor of new jersey. [ laughter ] "oh, man. ugh!"rnie sanders, yesterday, had breakfast in harlem with the reverend al sharpton. interesting, usually when an old em, it's because he fell asleep on the train. [ laughter ] today said he is the only candidate who has the you know what to go up against donald trump. oh, my god, jeb.m to have balls if you don't even have the balls to say balls. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it's donald trump. just say it.rmer new york city mayor, mike bloomberg, recently ran two
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for his possible presidential campaign.auging? buddy, the two hottest candidates are the jewish guy and the billionaire.ved invitation? [ laughter ] marco rubio has revealed that her while eating a twix bar yesterday. [ laughter ] twix, of course, is rubio's because you get to eat the same thing twice. [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] aww. i'm sorry. i'm sorry.n reported that infamous drug lord, el chapo, will stand trial in brooklyn. though i'm not sure it's a good idea to try him in a place that has like five tunnels. [ laughter ] he is known to use tunnels to escape. [ laughter ]e. [ laughter ] every now and then, you want to
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oday claim captured the sound of two black holes colliding one billion ars away. let's take a listen. hello [ laughter ]eers and applause ] >> seth: twin sisters in new jersey this week gave birth girls just minutes apart from each other. [ nervous laughter ] "that's weird," said one of their boyfriends. [ laughter ] that almost 50 people have died since 2014 while attempting to take selfies.ising number that
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[ laughter ]pplause ] and finally, new photos have revealed that kim jong-un is a mac user -- t out a word. kim jong-un is a big mac user. [ laughter ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a great show for you tonight. [ cheers and applause ]ilm, "the meddler," academy award winner susan sarandon is in the house tonight. [ cheers and applause ] she's a wonderful actress.m, "how to be single." alison brie stops by the show. [ cheers and applause ] of "garbage time" on fox sports 1. katie nolan is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] sports. i'm so excited that she's here to talk to us about her show. but before we get to all of that, this is a very important service we provide on the show.ys, slang terms are evolving so fast that sometimes, it is hard to keep up with them. and so we here at "late night" have decided to give you a little primer and we like to ed in a
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lause ] >> seth: our first slang term is, "basic." many of you have probably heard someone be described as "basic." so what does it mean?d to describe anything involving extremely obvious behavior, dress, or action. for example, "gina has worn his week. she basic." [ laughter ] now, that's a term you've probably heard before, but there are some new terms that are justcome popular. here's a new one called, "tinderella." it's a term that means, "a tinder date who seems cool until they black out and become a different person." [ laughter and applause ] let's see it in a sentence -- "heather was funny, charming and beautiful when i picked her up, e night, she lost a shoe and smelled like an old pumpkin. total tinderella." [ laughter ] a very helpful term, is "stanktuary." [ laughter ] let's see what it means -- "a refuge you seek when your s in his sleep." [ laughter ] let's see it in a sentence.
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yesterday. long story short, i had to find stanktuary and slept on the couch." [ applause ]rs to use. you can use that in your everyday life. up next, it's "slapchat." let's see the definition. girlfriend sees you liked someone else's sexy photos and she slaps the crap out of you." [ laughter ] saw i liked samantha's butt pictures. #slapchatted." [ laughter ] up next, a very helpful one in the winter, it's "blizz blaze."ans -- "when you get high during a blizzard." [ laughter ] for example, "two feet of fresh and two ounces of fresh trees in my bowl. time to blizz blaze." [ laughter and applause ]-sehole." [ laughter ] let's see the definition -- when your roommate fills up your dvr with a british show you don't want." [ laughter ]i tried to record 'south park' but my dvr was full of 'masterpiece theater.'" [ laughter ]
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because up until now, you haven't had a word for that. [ laughter ] our next term is, "gramnesia." let's see what it means -- "when you show up in an instagram photo that you don't remember taking." [ laughter ]things got a little hazy last night, but according to instagram, i blizz blazed with becky. #gramnesia [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] moving on.of mine, it's "blow-prah." let's see what it means -- a generous person who gives cocaine to everyone in the room." [ laughter ]rty was a bust, but then travis came in and was like, 'you get cocaine! and you get cocaine! everybody gets cocaine!' [ laughter and applause ] next up we have, "regretflix."- "when you binge watch an entire show and then realize you didn't like
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[ laughter ] watched 10 episodes of 'marco polo' in a day. #ishouldhaveblizzblazed." [ laughter ]lly we have "nomoji." let's see what the definition complicated that no emoji can [ laughter ] with me, and i'm sad about it, because i think we really could have had something, but i'm also not sad, because i know in the out, but that also doesn't mean i'm happy.e like i'm grateful for the time we had together, and i'll never forget when we got ice cream on the pier that one day, and how we fought about what kind of dog isarted out as a fake fight, but then turned into a real fight, because it always seems like he wasn't taking my feelings into consideration and, honestly, i'msed, because he said he was happy and then, all of a sudden, he doesn't want to see me anymore, and i guess i just have a lot of questions and i'm fearful, and hopeful, and sad, and if i'm being honest, a little hungry. [ cheers and applause ] that was "seth explains teen slang." we'll be back with
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can't make this stuff up. four bandits chose a prius as their getaway car. bravo-niner, in pursuit of a toyota prius. over. how hard is it to catch a prius? over.tually pretty fast. over. very funny. oh look, a farmer's market.t some flowers for the car. yeah! holly! toyota. let's go places. [burke] at farmers, we've seen almost everything, so we know how to cover almost anything. even "turkey jerks." [turkey] gobble. [butcher] i'm sorry! (burke) covered march fourth,2014. talk to farmers. we've seen almost everything,o cover almost anything.
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okay, what is this? really icy. wooh. that' s intense! it just hits you. its gum. no. it' s totally a mint! it' s disappearing as i am chewing it. where did it go? mint. it' s a breakthrough in cool. ice breakers cool blasts. piano music. you have to experience this city. that's what you always say. you were right about the food. hi john. hey kevin. an astronaut. one more. it's beautiful, isn't it? how about a baseball game next time? done! book priceless experiences
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only at priceless.com. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. please, give it up for the 8g band over there. [ cheers and applause ]n sitting inn on drums all week with 8g band. from tv on the radio, jaleel bunton is here. [ cheers and applause ] city area, be sure to check out union pool in brooklyn with the thank you so much for being here, jaleel, this week.
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>> so welcome. thank you.e ] >> seth: thank you. our first guest tonight is an academy award winning actress, "thelma and louise" and "dead man walking." she can be seen next in "the meddler," which opens in theaters april 22nd.r show, susan sarandon. [ cheers and applause ] how are you? >> thank you. so they're just as happy as i am to have you here. >> oh, i'm so -- i'm even happier to be here. that's so great.it's always a delight to see you. >> thank you. >> seth: and i remember one of my favorite times that i got to see you was -- you did -- great digital shorts at "snl." >> yeah. >> seth: you were in "mother lover." the sequel. they said there couldn't be a box," but -- >> they all said that. >> seth: they all said that.
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>> seth: how did you get approached? what was the phone call like? >> i was doing -- it wasn't a phone call.broadway show. and they said, you wanna do a sequel to "dick in a box"? [ laughter ] asked my sons -- my younger son, and he said, "mom it's a classic, you absolutely have to do it." [ laughter ], there's no script. i don't know, really, what it is. do i like the "dick in a box?" [ laughter ] what is -- where a? >> seth: yeah. >> and then they said, no, it's not actually the "dick in the box, thing. >> seth: yes. >> and i still didn't know what it was. [ laughter ] but based on the fact that everybody there was so great, was so. i said, yeah, okay. and so we had to do it around my schedule, which was not easy.say that we filmed, you know, really, like at 2:00 after my show. >> seth: right. >> so 2:00 in the morning, with all kinds of
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and i was, you know, you don't remember what you do at like 2:00 in the morning. you know? >> seth: no. [ light laughter ] >> so i thought they did such a aved my ass, actually. because there were all kinds of strange things happening, and they were very tasteful. >> seth: yes. [ laughter ] >> so i thought that it was -- it is a classic. that one's, too, a classic. a classic. i will tell you this, that we won -- for march madness, we picked -- i picked my favorite 64 digital out sheets and everybody at snl voted down and "mother lover" was the most popular digital short amongst the staff of -- >> no way!ital shorts. >> oh, my god. >> seth: yes. [ cheers and applause ] but now, i feel like there's some unrated director's cut out ant to see now that -- >> there could be. there could be. >> seth: i wanna talk to you about -- it's very hard to segue from "mother lover" to this, but this is such an impressive thing you're doing.to greece to work on the international refugee crisis. and you actually got to speak to some of the refugees there. tell us about your t the conversations you had.
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and i think practically everybody here is related to an t or refugee, unless you're native american, right? >> seth: yeah. >> at some point. and i always thought of the united states as being so es and blah blah blah. and then there was this crescendo of hate fear based rhetoric that was coming out of our drunk uncle at the wedding, trump. [ laughter ] >> and i was like, you know, who -- these poor people, you know, they've been reduced to a concepr people. who are they? why did they leave? what's their story? you know, what do they want? maybe somebody should listen to them. so, i thought well, maybe if i go over unaffiliatedand listen and not be associated with any group. but of course, i didn't know what i was doing. so i had to call someone that had been over there.r me, this great guy said i'll go back and help you and -- because i know where to stay and everything else.nt, tyson photographed
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we just spent -- some photos of these people. >> like two weeks -- 11 days. just wandering, greeting boats, helping people going to all the various camps, going up and down the coast. talking to the amazing eers from all over who, you know, were setting up soup kitchens. because, when everybody comes inboats that are very, very dangerous. and they're wet and they're cold. it was already freezing. i was there through christmas. and just asking, you know, why did you leave? you know, and they tell me their houses -- they were from all over.yria and afghanistan. iraq, iran. eritrea, morocco, sudan. i mean, so there's all these uages which makes it also very difficult. somewhere between 4,000 and 12,000 people arriving every day. they're gonna arrive. and then, it only gets worse from there.
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very tired. pregnant women. people who've just had babies. someone actually had a baby on the boat.ntainable moral catastrophe that shouldn't be politicized. and so i asked this one woman and i said, you know, just how could this seem like a good idea, getting on this terrible little boat with 60 people ands and you're pregnant. she said, well, imagine that you're in -- on the third floor of an apartment building, and it catches on fire, and you know ifilled. but if you jump out the window, there's a chance you'll survive. that's what our choice is.lked to people whose, up. and i said, well, do you know, you know, who dropped the bomb? it doesn't really does it? >> seth: no. the bomb's the more important >> everything's gone. and so, these people have lives, and professions, and dreams, and hopes and wants for their kids to get an education.
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and safe.a mother wants. >> seth: and you say, it should be a moral issue as opposed to a political issue. and people can go to your yes? and donate? >> yeah. i -- on my facebook page, have the independent, like, these really great independent little groups that are kind of filling in where the ngos can't, if you're an ngo, you're much -- there's much more bureaucracy. >> seth: of course.ey're doing a good job, but the little people that are doing all these other kind of things, i can vouch for them. so the ones that are on my website, there's just a few, but i know that they spend their money right. and so if anybody feels -- or if "the huffington post" was great. they stepped up, and everyday i would go home and write about what i'd seen and post pictures.ngton post," somehow you can find it on there. i don't know, me, i guess you can find it. and you can see the faces and s of these people. >> seth: well, thank you so much for doing that. that's fantastic.lly happy to. >> seth: i'm glad you took that trip.
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you mentioned -- you mentioned bernie supporter -- >> yeah! >> seth: and you've gone on the campaign trail with bernie. >> yeah, and he balls balls! iowa. believe me. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: yeah, he does. he has balls. >> i've been, when i went to iowa, i was so moved by the be -- to reinvest in this country and really want to believe and he simple, you know, fdr kind of plans that are totally possible and should be done, because, you know, you talk to people who can't -- can't go to the doctor because their co-pay is too high.'t pay off their school debt. they can't, you know, the country needs infrastructure. there's so many things -- and i another person who's been in government as long as he has, and managed not to take any money from the bad guys.onnected to wall street. he's not connected to monsanto.cted to, you know, big pharm. it's possible --
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yes?n you go to these -- >> mix, i mean, certainly, the 15,000 volunteers that came to iowa, a lot of them were really young. but no, you look out and -- no, it was really, really diverse. people that have been following him, because, you know, he hadn't really gotten coverage until lately. so a lot of people, younger ere very hip to what he was talking about before everybody else. but now that people are able to listen, i think that it's very mixed. but in iowa -- it's very easy to listen to him, 'cause he's very loud. he will raise his voice. you can -- even if you're not in the room, you're like, i think that's bernie. he's saying some very interesting things.t able to be in new hampshire, but i'm going to nevada and i'm going to south carolina. it's been a great experience to just see the patriots of this country that are wanting to be part of th make sure you're registered to vote. and if you're democrat -- democratic, if you're independent -- a lot of people were switching.aucuses, you can switch.
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if you want to be affiliated and vote in the primary, you have to be registered as democrat. so, make sure you haven't passed -- in new york the deadline wasew? >> seth: i think that's great, but i do want to talk about another issue. our country. a serious issue. >> yes. >> seth: you presented at the sag awards. >> yeah.ed -- and piers morgan -- >> yeah. >> seth: had a criticism of the way you were dressed. >> yeah. >> seth: there you are. yeah. [ cheers and applause ]u were presenting the in memorium. and piers morgan took to twitter and said that this was and you immediately -- you fought back here hard. >> well, actually a lot of people -- does he have a job? a real job? why does he have so much time? >> seth: currently, this might be the closest thing he has. >> he's doing something again today. he can't stop. i don't think his mother n something's like -- [ laughter ] >> seth: okay. that might be it. >> i hate to say he's milking the situation. >> seth: he is milking it.
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then -- see, i think he plays this perfectly. because what did your supporters start doing? him with pictures of their cleavage. [ laughter ] >> seth: i don't know. i'm thinking piers morgan's sitting at home at his computer right now saying, i played this just right.ave to google anything. my internet history is fine. they're just coming to me. >> well, god bless him. god bless him.nd god bless you. thank you for being here. >> thank you for having me.e ] >> seth: register to vote. >> register to vote. >> seth: and wear whatever you want. >> wear whatever you want. >> seth: whatever you want. susan sarandon, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] to find out more information on as to susan's official nice facebook page. we'll be right back with
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night," everybody. actress you know from shows like "mad men" and "community." she stars in the new movie "how to be single," which hits theaters tomorrow. let's take a look. million people in this city. sounds like a lot, right? half of them are women.
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college, i don't swing that way. and then you got to have some age limits. so let's say, over 20. >> got to keep it legal. >> under 40. >> keep it sexy. >> now it's a million.talking about a million guys. >> but, of half of them are married. 10% are gay. college-educated. not too ugly. so. >> there's your boyfriend. >> i wish.ome to the show, alison brie. [ cheers and applause ] you, you look beautiful. >> thank you. thank you. i'm so happy you're here. >> i'm so happy to be here. >> seth: you got to shoot this film in new york city. >> yeah. >> seth: whin. >> it's so fun. >> seth: and you, your character lives in the meatpacking district, known for its night life. >> yes, yes. o experience any of it while you were here.
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but you know, we were mostly shooting nights. >> seth: of course.so we would finish at like 7:00 in the morning. but, one night i tried to go out, your buddy, colin jost, was shooting with us. >> seth: yes. >> and, so we finished at like, ers holm and like, we could go get a drink. what should we do? colin, you're a man about town. >> seth: yeah. >> you're a local here, where should we go? >> seth: yeah, i wish i was there, i would have told you it's just a bad call. [ limed immediately, i was like, he seems so cool. so, first i wanted to go to the coyote ugly bar that was right around the corner. >> seth: yeah. >> seth: shouted down. >> i can't, i can't. >> seth: yeah, okay. >> so, then he was like, "no, i know this great place. super classy. it's like, upstairs. it's at a hotel.ere like "lauren, are we okay. this is very low key." >> seth: what were you dressed like -- >> just like jeans and sneakers, and like, very large backpacks. we were at work. >> seth: okay, yeah.ike wayward travelers. >> seth: you shouldn't of asked, because there is no place where that's okay. [ light laughter ] >> in new york? >> seth: yeah. >> that's not cool?
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bouncer, you've already lost. >> hey guys, we're big movie actors.rms. [ light laughter ] >> what? i thought everybody loves that. >> seth: yeah. >> so anyway, so we walked around the corner. and then he wasn't quite sure where it was. debating. >> seth: sounds like colin. >> right. >> seth: sounds like colin. mission. we get, we approach a very large bouncer in a line with what looked like sort of cool people, so we went in. but it was not low key. almost immediately, they were like, you have to check all your stuff. let us pat you down, which i nge for like, a casual hotel -- >> seth: yup. >> -- bar, we walked through a corridor that was like, all black light. >> seth: uh-huh. >> at which i was sort of like, that seems out of the ordinary.or, and when the doors opened, just a waft of smoke. it was like, like weed and chlorine. >> seth: oh, no. like, now i'm curious. but, we went in and it was just like a very hardcore hip-hop club with a jacuzzi in the middle of the dance floor.er ] i wished i was in a bikini, and
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my spot. yes, this is my night. >> but i was dressed as like, nerd alert. >> seth: yeah. >> we looked at colin and he was just like, "yeah, i don't think this is the place i was looking for." >> seth: you're like, we're here to break up this party. [ light laughter ] >> we're on the scene. yeah.y there too, was like, you guys don't belong. >> seth: also, they went home and they're like, "i always thought like, movie stars were cool, but a couple of them came to this party and they were the worst people there." [ light laughter ] losers. >> seth: they were the biggest losers. >> i was so embarrased. >> seth: and does this happen to you? do you go shooting on location, and end up in the wrong places? >> no.r, clearly. i don't know what i'm doing, no. usually, when i'm out of town on location, i'm like very mellow. that's why it is cool to shoot in new york, because you know more people. >> seth: yeah.en i'm places i don't know anyone and i kind of just like, go to spas. >> seth: oh, that's nice. >> i have like, me -- i take me days.wonderful. >> yeah. >> seth: do you enjoy the spa life? >> i normally enjoy it. but sometimes, you know, things just don't work out.ory about that.
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[ light laughter ] yeah. >> i was in toronto shooting ke-up woman, you know, told me you should go to this great spot. sort of new, and it has this cool thing.se. it's all women. and i thought "great, it's all women. it's going to be really, like e naked and just enjoy luxuriating." >> seth: great. >> i love to be fully nude at a spa. i feel like it's one of the lastly can do that. >> seth: yeah. other than home. >> and home. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> where else? another spot. i like to do it in front of >> seth: gotcha. so this is your thing. okay. >> so i get there, and i go in, like, old school feeling bath house. one large room. and they had a whole system. there was liwall that was like, here's the way you're supposed to do the spa. and do like, the sea salt pool, and then dip in the freezing cold pool. >> seth: oh, like the order of . >> there was an order. which i love. again, i'm just a very nerdy. >> seth: okay, yeah. >> it's like, good, i know what
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>> seth: i like that you like -- i like to go to a spa to relax it is supposed to go. [ light laughter ] >> very focused and just know exactly what i'm doing. 5 minutes in the sea salt pool. 5 minutes the spa, in the sauna.it go, how order right? was everything going well? >> i was doing the order right. i was very focused on the order. so much so, that i kind of didn't notice that the spa was very crowded and with like, big groups of girls who were coming together. on like, bachelorette weekends, or just like groups of friends together. and everyone was fully clothed.o. >> with like one-piece, like old school, old lady bathing suites with shorts. to the point where, finally i looked around and realized person. >> seth: oh, no. [ light laughter ] >> at the whole spa. it was like, as if maybe it was a rule that you we're not allowed to be naked at this spa.into like, the sauna, which was very small, you know there'd be these weird "mean girl" moments of like, everyone's talking and laund naked girl walks in. and they all just -- [ laughter ] tory 45 seconds, and then leave the sauna.
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the whole thing. instead of feeling embarrassed --ou owned it. >> i just was peacocking around. >> seth: oh, great. >> i was just like, this is my body, women. love it. you are the biggest loser at the new york club then and the coolest person at the spa. >> coolest. [ light laughter ] definitely the coolest. >> seth: i like that you can do, you can be either side of the pole. i love that. >> yeah, yeah. i rock the whole spectrum. >> seth: watch this, this is going to be a really good transition. i'm gonna take that to be a really good transition. because, you were on two incredibly popular and famous shows at the exact same time. >> both sides of the spectrum. >> seth: both sides of, could be farther. >> boom. >> seth: one, a mad cap comedy. one, an incredibly intense drama, a period drama. and, uh --eth: well, "mad men", of course, incredibly, the clothes were amazing and obviously specific to the time. and accurate. not fun to wear? >> they could be both.- well you know, they were a bit restrictive. and there's a bit of a learning curve in terms of, i think,
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them.know what a girdle is like. >> seth: i don't. >> it is sort of like olden day spanx.ad boning. it starts like, here under the boobs, and goes down, and turns into bike shorts essentially. super sexy. >> seth: yeah? >> and it had, like, boning and is very tight and gives us that amazing shape and what not. but basically, you're supposed to wear it like as underwear. >> seth: right. underwear. >> seth: okay. >> but i didn't know that for like a season and a half of "mad men." >> so you had an extra lu did not need. >> extra underwear that were also very difficult to reach. , and all this stuff. so, it proved problematic when they were taking me to set one day and, i like, really had to pee. sure, that will happen. >> you know, as you do. >> seth: yes, you do, yeah. >> you know, you have to pee. i was still new to the show, and i think i never wanted to be, cause any trouble. you know? >> seth: yeah. >> so i was just, sort of like, yes, i'm ready to go right n
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immediately like, "i can't, we can't go all, i have to, please let me stop and good to the bathroom." and they were like, great, no problem. oom and like lifting, it's like you're really working blind. >> seth: yeah. >> you know you're lifting up under all this skirts and you can, sort of, the girdles are , kind of pull it to the side and use the bathroom. they thought of everything. [ light laughter ] except that i har underneath. this is getting sort of, graphic. >> seth: yeah. [ light laughter ] because you're running out of hands. >> yes. so like, i'm sort of reaching ike things are fine, and i'm like, doing like a crazy hover over this like, public bathroom stall on the way to the set.ing and i like, can't hear the pee hitting [ laughter ] >> seth: not good. missed my underwear. they didn't quite make it out of the way. and i just did a full pee. not a slight trickle. middle. [ light laughter ] i just got very warm. just soaked.ime.
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down with toilet paper. [ light laughter ] and then someone was outside full scene. >> seth: wow. >> see if you can find it. >> seth: thank you so much for being here. such a pleasure. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you for having me. >> seth: alison brie, everybody. "how to be single" is in theaters starting tomorrow.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. here at "late night," we have a lot of expenses. to cover the cost of those expenses, we have taken on some sponsors. sponsors we aren't proud of. money from, but because we did, we now have to mention them on the air.i'd like to apologize in "late night" is brought to you by menthol peanut butter. [ light laughter ] from the makers of menthol peanut butter with that smooth menthol flavor. menthol peanut butter, now that's a cool sandwich.
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we're also sponsored by rabie bjorn.ughter ] the perfect carrier for your rabid raccoon. now the little guy can go with you whereever you go, no matter how angry he is. [ laughter ] rabie bjorn. also, hambien. [ light laughter ] hungry and restless? we have the solution. a big pile of ambien cured meat that causes drowsiness on purpose. hambien, the ultimate midnight snack.ght laughter ] really sorry about this next one. water bottles full of vodka. is your office job bringing you down, but drinking at your desk is frowned upon? cause now, you have water bottles full of vodka. you work hard, you play hard, and you're an alcoholic. [ laughter and applause ] about lee press-on nails for men. hey accountants, want to look like a real man? lee press on nails for men come in mechanic, coal miner, and lumberjack. [ laughter ]ls for men, like utter disregard for clean nails.
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really, apologies in advance for shalube. [ laughter ] the only personal lubricant on the market endorsed by the actor tony shalhoub.t time you want to "monk"-ey around in the bedroom. [ light laughter ]be. "late night" is also sponsored by potato chips potatoes. wish whole potatoes tasted as good as potato chips? try potato chip potatoes.eassembled from potato chips. [ light laughter ] potato chip potatoes, mm-mm-mm, it's bad for you. [ light laughter ]ape. [ light laughter ] are you depressed, but can't ication? try smile tape. [ laughter ] it'll turn your frown upside down. next up, camp sarcasm. have earnest kids? sure you do.p sarcasm,
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[ light laughter ] you can ride horses and just d crafts. your kid's a real picasso. [ light laughter ] camp sarcasm, they're gonna love it. [ light laughter ] up next, boilet.ith boiling hot water. [ light laughter ] never have a dirty toilet again. boilet, sanitary. [ light laughter ], pit wigs. [ laughter ] embarrassed that everybody in gym class hit puberty before you?ore with pit wigs. the fake hair for your armpits that says, i'm a cool guy who's been to second base. pit wigs. now available in pubes. [ audience oohs ] those, were our terrible here's a message from our good ones, we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] this is a cell tower from one of those major carriers. straight talk wireless uses the same cell towers they do.
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sfx: cell phone vibrates. yeah?okay... he's okay, he made it! jason.. what do you mean? we were very bad boys. alexa what's in the news? alexa: here's the news, "alec baldwin and jason schwartzman were seen mooning paparazzi. baldwin threw his shoe at making a run for it". my poor cashmere socks... alexa, will you order another pair of brescianis. reordering bresciani socks. can you send some lawyers or something? (moaning)
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for the pastlasted authorities by making their getaway in a prius. this game ends now. you've gotta be a prius. guys, what's that?
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: our next guest is the host of fox sports 1's "garbage time with katie nolan" and the podc please welcome to the show, katie nolan. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: hi, how are you? >> a little nervous. i've never sat in a skirt beforeing. >> seth: and true, because you have a job where you get to be the desk person, like me. >> yes, i do. could we swap? >> s more comfortable you can sit wherever you want. you're doing great. >> thank you. >> seth: i love your show. but it was really exciting because you got to go out to the super bowl, and it was a different scene for you. was it fun to be out there? >> yeah!erent. we normally shoot our show in a closet. >> seth: yes. >> with no people. opposite of that. >> seth: it's all the people. >> it's every -- every person was there.
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different, but it was really fun. and we got to get some really ke everyone's there. >> seth: you interviewed victor cruz, and i wanna show a clip of it, because you got him to do an impression that i thought was pretty fantastic. and you obviously thought it was great too.it real quick. >> can you confirm that you can do a manning face? >> i can do -- you want to see it right now? >> i, you know, i'd love to. ] >> was that good? >> it's so perfect. >> seth: it's so perfect! it's a perfect eli manning face. and then to prove it, because you showed this. ress box and then you side by side it. and i just wanna show exactly how good -- [ laughter ] >> it's so good. >> seth: it's so, so good. -- i never thought he would do it. i thought i was gonna ask him, and he'd be like, well, that's, you know, my quarterback. i can't -- he just didn't even hesitate. >> seth: i will say, because if, you know, you've interviewed athletes, like, a lot of them rained. and so, it's nice to see them have a silly moment. >> yeah. >> seth: have you found that interviewing athletes, that someti actually interesting things out
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>> yes, it's tough, because, like you said, they're so buttoned up and taught to not ever say anything that could be misconstrued.w, we take sports so seriously here. [ light laughter ] but the best thing about our show is that we try to put athletes in like a really uncomfortable situation that o, so there's no way they possibly could have had any training for what we throw at them. >> seth: right. an example? >> so we had odell beckham jr. on the show, and he had just done a day of press at espn, h they call the car wash. >> seth: yes, where you do every single show. >> every -- it's like a press junket for a movie star, but -- so it's for athletes. and the next day, he came to do our show after morning practice., we're gonna get odell beckham jr. and he's gonna be exhausted. there's no question that he hasn't already answered about the one handed catch and all that.ded, because "mad men" was coming to a close, that we would have odell beckham jr. read lines for various parts in "mad men." >> seth: uh-huh.g that he would be like, "no, what are you talking about?"
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have you ever seen "mad men" i'm like, "you're gonna love this bit." [ laughter ] no idea -- and he stood there and just read off teleprompter a bunch of lines from "mad men." >> seth: and that is definitely not something they warned him about beforehand.t. >> seth: you're about to do an interview on a sports show, be prepared for the "mad men" thing. [ light laughter ] you did -- you mentioned you shoot in a closet. i've been in your studio, en in blazers" another show is in the same closet, basically. they just point the cameras a different way, you were telling me. tv was made, they would be shocked already. when we tell people we do two shows out of that tiny -- it's like 10 feet by 10 feet. and out of -- there's only three walls. it's a very small space. >> seth: it seems like it's criminal to make you do a show there. >> it does seem that way. wanted to move us to a bigger studio, we wouldn't be mad. >> seth: but it's great. the show survives there, and, also you are wonderful at it. >> it's fun. it's like, we got to do the showsmall and so low budget. otherwise, fox would have been
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television show." >> seth: i want to commend you on something, because your show is not just about sports. you have a comic take on things. but you also are very good at addressing serious issues. you've talked about greg hardy on the dallas cowboys, ray rice, domestic violence in the league, been hard on roger goodell. you recently were invited out at the super bowl to -- roger goodell did a women's summit. you couldn't go but how -- as a woman who is a football fan, ande, if you had the chance to ask roger goodell a question now, what would you ask him? >> what's your deal, bro? ] no, i would ask him genuinely, like "what are you actually planning on doing to fix the estic violence in your league?" because it's been shown it's an issue and we can try to sweep it under the rug. but it's so clearly a huge problem.so much that the nfl does. it's about optics. it's about making it look like they're doing something. and so, i mean, yeah, i would just be curious to know what the
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fix this. so that, as a woman and other women, we feel comfortable going to a football game and being a proud to call ourselves football fans. >> seth: well, i'm really glad that there are people like you calling him out on that, and i think there needs to be more voices in sports. so, nicely done there. >> thank you.nd applause ] >> seth: and -- but you mention -- you mention optics, and i want to make sure there's not something wrong with your optics.u are a vocal -- you say that as rob ryan, the defensive coordinator now for the buffalo bills, you believe a handsome man. >> yes. >> seth: you have a crush on rob ryan. >> i'm sorry, the handsomest man. yeah. handsomest man in sports? >> so, like, i'm not sure why that's so weird for everybody, because as you'll see like, look at that flow, seth. [ laughter ] everyone's like, what are you talking about? he's like, the life of the party. look at this. not a guy you
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parents. >> a thousand percent. my parents would be like, "wait, he's our age." but that's besides the point. look at --king a coors light and handing out i don't even know what. roses? is that a cigar in his mouth? like, come on! >> seth: yeah, there ya go. he's a catch. >> true love. >> seth: he is a catch. i hope he's watching. >> i doubt he is.love you. [ laughter ] >> seth: thank you so much for being here. >> thank you for having me. >> seth: so great to meet you. katie nolan, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] "garbage time with katie nolan" returns this spring on fox
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: my thanks to susan sarandon, alison brie. katie nolan, everybody! jaleel bunton, and of course, the 8g band. stay tuned for "carson daly."morrow. [ cheers and applause ]

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